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10 THINGS I FUCKING HATE ABOUT YOU!

10 THINGS I FUCKING HATE ABOUT YOU!

 

  1. 47355217You think all girls are the same and shit, but listen asshole, who told you to be a generalized prick and label every girl? Not all of us are girls. Some are grown MILFS or cougars and the others have a head. Not the ‘head’ you are thinking of, but we have brains and we CAN think. Not all of us are Bella Swans. Think of us like Jessica Jones or better yet, Meryl Streeps.
  2. 268A73ED00000578-2981457-image-a-6_1426086552132You see all those posts on social media and the internet, that say, ‘girls want diamonds and expensive dinners and cockapoo; for me it is really a Darth Vader plastic ring (thought a diamond rings also works, but not when you think I am only interested in them), a walk in the park and then eating humans like Hannibal does. That man knows how to cook. So should you.
  3. large.jpgAll girls love pink, and makeup, and Barbies’, Woah! Woah! Listen you dumbfuck, pink is a colour and even certain guys can pull pink off better than any girl I have seen, so your argument is invalid. If you still want to argue about which gender should wear which colour, then you should put your sorry ass in the gutter. Oh, and makeup, well I have seen guys getting groomed and wearing fairness creams, but you think it is not manly enough. Well, we are women, we wear makeup, because it is ‘feminine’ and not ‘manly’, SMH! And the thing is, Barbies don’t interest me. A Harley Davidson on the other hand does.
  4. ‘You watch football?! Girls don’t watch football.’ Oh how naïve you are love. Not only do I fucking love football, I support Arsenal and know what an offside rule is. I have a guy-friend who has no idea about football, but yet here you are, thinking all girls watch reality TV and crush on Justin Bieber. Bleh!27b0f2452a363c73ee3bbe69093bfd3f.jpg
  5. 17410-Be-A-Lady.jpgI hear people and you in particular say, ‘girls should not swear. It is not feminine or ladylike?’ Well, sucker, I swear. So does Adele. And please, refer to number 3 and talk of gender later. Hades help me, swearing is caring anyways. Where is Derrida when I need him?
  6. If you think, we don’t know shit about porn. We do. I know who James Deen is and who Tori Black is. Better yet, I know revenge porn exists but I am not stupid to share nudes or any pictures with random guys or my partner, when he knows the real deal will be behind closed doors. 05136dba58162c251308a4fb0ae8ffddee4702-wm.jpgKnowing about porn, doesn’t make me vulgar or cheap or even a whore. It is an ‘interesting’ afterthought. And yes I do research. I don’t want, fucking Cosmopolitan or Playboy telling me shit, I already know. And we all live in the 21st So what is your question?
  7. 410gd47nO-L._SX333_BO1,204,203,200_.jpgWomen make terrible leaders. They have a place in the kitchen making rotis.’ Oh fuck yes. All the wars happened because of women. Just look at what’s happening today. The World Wars happened because most of the leaders were women. The Great Depression came because of women. The recent fall in the ruble came because of women. Oh, and the recent war on ISIS is happening because of women leaders. Your statement is very right. As for making rotis, I can make them in any shape. But not circular. I would rather order pizza and fatten myself up. From where I come from, the Pathans make impeccable rotis, and they make them as circular as the god forsaken shape, circle itself.
  8. Muslim women, are very subdued, and caged, and chained, and repressed. Islam is very repressive towards women.’ Oh hell no! You did not just stereotype. Again! What is fucking wrong with you? Not only are you narrow-minded but you have a very narrow definition of a Muslim woman. See. Feminism is a new trend nowadays. Everyone wants to be a feminist and everyone who isn’t a feminist, is prosecuted like the Salem Witch Trials. But if feminism is about gender equality then we should give women equal rights to do what pleases them. Listen. If you aren’t, a supposedly ‘liberal’ political bastard, I may grow to like you. If the Western woman took more than an eternity, to finally have a say in socio-political or geo-economic matters; when American women finally got their rights to vote, after 300 years of gaining independence from the British; when finally Western women were allowed to wear pants after the 1960s; when Western women have the right to go naked and show off their assets and appear on Playboy; then a Muslim woman has the right to cover herself up. I may not cover myself up like a Muslim woman should. Burka-Women.jpgI may also, not be a proper role model for you to take into, the definition of a Muslim woman; but not all Muslim woman practice the abhaya. Would you want your nuns to not wear a habit? In Christianity, women are also told to cover their heads. Orthodox Christian women cover theirs while going to their churches. Women in certain parts of India and China, also cover their heads. But no, no! A MUSLIM WOMAN IS UNDER THE PATRIARCHY! SHE SHOULD BE FREE! No bae. Listen to me you little piece of shit, Pakistan as a Muslim country has had a woman Prime Minister. Queen Rania of Jordan is also a Muslim, and she doesn’t look like Muslim to you, cuz she doesn’t cover her head and dresses ‘Western-ly’. Bangladesh has had a woman President. How many presidents of America were women? Your judgment is clearly misinformed.
  9. Man-Being-ChivalrousI don’t want you doing everything for me. I am in independent woman. I can open the toilet door to pee, and shit. I don’t want you saving me every time, I tumble. Hell, sometimes I want you to just hug me and open the car door for me because it is cute and considerate. And yes I am a hopeless romantic but that doesn’t mean, I want you bathing me every time I want to take a shower. Being independent doesn’t mean, I want to do everything myself. It is all a balancing act. And you are the other side of the sea-saw.
  10. Of all the things, I really fucking hate about you, is that, it is impossible to hate you. Hate is such a childish emotion. I could be indifferent and then become a ‘bastard’ like Joffery ‘Lannister’ Baratheon or Ramsay ‘Snow’ Bolton and do all sorts of weird BDSM shit with you, until you beg me to eat your leg. Bon appétit.1350608999068_1236184.png

 

 

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